On January 28th. Off to a resolute start.
I wish I had a blast in 2021. It was average at best. Just a year.
To be fair, I'm glad my family is alive and healthy—that was the bar. It may feel, even to me, like the bare minimum, but when you give it a thought, there isn't a more maxed-out resolution than that.
Imagine: "My new year's resolution is for no one in my entire family to die or get any sicker." Wonderful, we'll keep that in mind. Thank you, Cinderella.
I conclude that I pretty much won at life last year because, unlike some of the years before, I really can't name one death that momentarily destabilized me. It was mostly just celebrities—which is sad, don't get me wrong—but girl, life goes on, I don't know her like that.
That's pretty unimaginable, even to me as I sifted through month by month looking for losses. A record-breaking win, as far as resolutions go.
I hate resolution culture.
Some of you resolution people are the absolute worst. Specifically, the ones that display the entire list on the internet like it's The 10 Commandments (which I am about to do), mantra "new year, new beginnings, " roughly 200 times, then proceed to harass everyone else about setting their lists, preferably in a pretty journal that will be filled with affirmations and accountability.
By March, they're usually assholes again.
That being said, I started thinking while I was on vacation (subtle flex, what's good) that I should maybe put together a list of things I'd like to work on throughout the year, so I got to scribbling some thoughts in my notes. I wanted to finalize it once I was back in the groove of things because heaven knows I can be an absolute waste of space on vacation. Did I mention I was on vacation?
Vacation. One with the ocean, sun, and food in another country.
I'm done. Sorry.
These are not entirely resolutions per se, they're more so...useful considerations. A group of things to put more effort towards, one day to become habitual. They are not in order of priority.
1. Let my phone go.
Like, leave her behind. She hasn't done anything specific in the past year to offend me. It's just gross how much I click around mindlessly on it to feel preoccupied.
good luck with this one sis.
2. More Patience.
Or less irritability? It feels like two issues in the same basket most times.
Both.
3. Less Tolerance for Nonsense.
You know, it's one thing to be accommodating, and it's another to be simply putting yourself through hell. No more miss universe; I'm not getting paid for that. Especially people gossiping around me, those moments of total discomfort are beginning to wear on my spirit.
4. Watch more Crime Documentaries.
Because what was that stupid resolution from the end of the year 2020(?) to stop?
God bless me; I watched Don't F**k with Cats and thought, "See, this is what my consumption of this kind of content is encouraging in other idiots". You don't watch people getting stabbed for fun, Chioma, that message wasn't wholly for you.
5. Post on Instagram???
All the best.
6. Patience.
Yes, again. I gave it more consideration because patience is a virtue.
All-round patience; even for nonsense. As in, I will patiently usher myself out of the situation, as I do not want to be involved anymore. Better that than overreaction or stress-induced bad decision making. It takes wisdom to quietly exit all stupidity; why fight fire with fire?
7. PSDE - ʎƃɹǝuǝʞɔᴉppǝzᴉsʇɔǝⅎɹǝd.
I've been soft because I've been told I can be tough. However, I'd like to amp up the tough, but only in necessary circumstances.
Let's take the aforementioned gossip into consideration. So it's happening before your eyes: Someone is going on their gossip run, and it's very awkward. What do you do?
Sometimes, I usher myself out—patience is a virtue style—most times I change the topic.
However, I would like to introduce a new contender: The silent stare.
Perfect for those who are not the homie, but tend to be present in spaces you often find yourself and have to remain cordial. If they refuse to take the hint: stare blankly. I don't care if it gets awkward, friend, that's on them to navigate.
Staring blankly is fine. The old me would stare blankly. I feel like Rihanna would stare blankly.
8. Life.
My bare maximum resolution from last year still stands. I hope for life and good health for everyone I hold dear.
Not really a resolution, more of an outlook.
There aren't ten so it's not the commandments.
Happy New Year!
